Why did two ferrets decide to meet?

They were trying to start a business.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How do you get rid of an itch?

Start from scratch.

What is simultaneously the best and sh*ttiest way to start your day?

Pooping

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

How many black people are needed to change a light bulb?

One less now, because the one who tried to steal the light bulb was shot by the cops.

Why did microsoft go straight to windows 10 ?

They were trying to keep their german market.

Decide Jokes More Decide Jokes

What did Schwarzenegger say when deciding which composer to be for Halloween?

I'll be Bach.

What's your excuse?

Well my dad says the world is changing every day . So I decided to wait until it settles down!"

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

What does Santa say when he meets your wife, your sister and your mother?

HO HO HO, Merry Christmas!

What do you get when The Dark Knight meets Edgar Allan Poe?

x-post from r/funny) Poetic Justice(http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblrme6ovqdnAp1rzkyaxo1500.png)

Business Jokes More Business Jokes

How's the business?

2) Do you have a girlfriend 1) Why are you stealing from our refrigerator

Why was Muhammad's dad always successful in business?

He made a gross prophet!

Ferret Jokes More Ferret Jokes

What happens when a bunch of ferrets get together?

None of your business.

Whatcha thinkin about?

Me: How ferrets are like if a cat and a scarf had a baby.