Why divorce now after all this time together?

Woman: We wanted to wait until the kids were dead.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did OJ Simpson want to move to Alabama?

Everyone has the same DNA.

Where did the seaweed... Where did the seaweed find a job?

In the "Kelp Wanted" section of the want-ads.

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

Why did the kids not receive presents for Christmas?

Because Rudolph intentionally grounded the team...

What do the English and Welsh have in common?

Kids are their definition of a good time.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Why do we never take the time to thank mislabeled concrete?

It's mistaken for granite.

What do you call a droid who's never on time?

BB-L8

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you call a woman with a very round head?

Sophia. (sphere) it works best spoken

What do you get when you cross the Cosby Show with Law &amp Order: SVU?

Women Say the Darndest Things

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

How long must I wait for that turtle soup I ordered?

Waiter: Well you know how slow turtles are.

Whenever I get to a restaurant and they say there is a wait I say "do you know who I am?

because while I wait I like to be introspective

Divorce Jokes More Divorce Jokes

What's the difference between Jared Fogle's divorce and other divorces?

Most married couples tried to stay together FOR the kids. Not divorce because of them.

How many divorced men does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Who knows, they never get the house.