Why do Italians wear gold necklaces?

So they know where to stop shaving

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why is flatulence more satisfying after a long struggle to push it out?

Because you know you made a real ef-**fart**

How'd you sleep?

Him: *texts* Horrible...I was tossing and turn- Me: *crawls out from under his bed* I KNOW, YOU POOR THING.

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why couldn't the duck stop smoking?

Because he was a quack addict

What song did Kim Jong Il request be played at his funeral?

Journey - Don't Stop Bereaving.

Italian Jokes More Italian Jokes

What are an Italian bench warmer's favorite vegetables?

Asparagi!

How do you tell an Italian has a flat tire?

Diego wop wop wop .

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why do Scottish men wear kilts?

Because their sheep can hear zippers.

What kind of tie does a pig wear ?

Pig's tie !

Shaving Jokes More Shaving Jokes

Where does Sean Connery put his beard clippings?

His shavings account.

Why do Italians wear gold chains?

So they know where to stop shaving.