Why do people keep a picture of their wife and kids in their wallet?

To remind them why there's no money in it

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

How's the baby?

Me: He keeps trying to shove socks thru the mail slot. Wife: Aw. His socks or yours Me: Socks is the neighbor's cat..

What the hell are you two doing?

He demanded. His wife turned to the stranger and said, "See, I told you he was stupid."

Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What is Error 619?

When your kid sleeps in between.

How did you end up here?

Elderly me: I made my kids steak instead of hot dogs. Him: *gasps* You monster.

People Jokes More People Jokes

What do cats and people that submit jokes with the punchline "PLAGIARISM" have in common?

THEY BOTH LICK THEIR PAWS!

Why do people in Afghanistan air dry after they shower?

Because of the towel ban

Picture Jokes More Picture Jokes

What do you get when you cross a camera with a mirror?

A: A camera that takes pictures of itself.

How does Santa Claus take pictures?

With his North Pole-aroid.

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

How do attractive men pay for things?

They handsome money to the cashier

What do you call it when you lend money to a bison?

A Buffa-Loan!

Remind Jokes More Remind Jokes

Why don't gelding horses like to race?

Because every time they go to the starting gate they're reminded "They're Off!".

How do you make a sports science major cry?

Remind them that high school is over.

Wallet Jokes More Wallet Jokes

Why is New Jersey called the Garden State?

Cause you're always guardin' your wallet, guardin' your car, and guardin' your house.

What do you get when you fart on your wallet?

Gas money