Diamond Jokes

What do you call a line of diamonds on fire?

Hotline Bling.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

Why did the bar owner by a diamond mine get arrested?

He attributed to the delinquency of a miner.

Why did the archaeologist ask a diamond out to dinner?

Because of his enthusiasm for Carbon-Dating.

Why do we say dogs are man's best friend? Why not say dogs are man's and woman's best friend?

Because diamonds are a woman's best friend.

What does marriage have in common with a deck of cards?

In the beginning, you only need two hearts and a diamond. Later on, a club and a spade.

When you wife asked you to buy her car, why did you buy her a diamond instead?

Because I couldn't find a fake car."

What happens when almonds die?

Diamond

What do you call a lump of coal and a diamond hanging out together?

Carbon Dating.

Why is a baby like an diamond?

Because it's a dear little thing.

What do you call two diamonds in a healthy relationship?

Carbon dating

How does a man keep his youth?

A: By giving her money furs and diamonds.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

How can Euchre and Marriage be similar?

Sometimes you start out all hearts and diamonds, but end up wishing you had a club and a spade.

Why was the diamond depressed?

He had been under a lot of pressure lately.