Discipline Jokes

How do you discipline your pet rock?

You hit rock bottom!

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

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Practice Jokes More Practice Jokes

What did God say after she made Eve?

Practice makes perfect."

What would Dorothy have said if she practiced Yoga instead of new age magical thinking?

There's no place like OM.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What did the lesbian-vampire say to her girlfriend?

See ya next month.

What do you call your girlfriend after a tough workout?

Sorbet

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

What did a police officer write in the criminal report, when they found a homey from the bottom of a lake, wrapped in 200 kg's of metal chains?

Offender stole more than he could carry by swimming

What do you call a person who steals and is then praised by his/her friends?

A Redditor.

Pet Rock Jokes More Pet Rock Jokes

How do you discipline your pet rock?

You hit rock bottom!

What is the difference between a Sun Devil fan and a pet rock?

About 3 IQ points

Fry Jokes More Fry Jokes

What's it made of?

An engineering major says "How is it made " An arts major says... "Would you like fries with that "

What do you call a trapped fly in a frying pan of stir fry?

Your mum

Statistic Jokes More Statistic Jokes

What physical trait does a shapely woman who studies statistics have?

Belle curves.

Why are birthday's good for you?

Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest!

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Why does Daniel love white vans?

Because he likes candy... *I'll walk myself out*

Who says you can't make someone love you?

I've got a bottle of Scotch, some duct tape and a fresh batch of cupcakes, that beg to differ.

Trigger Jokes More Trigger Jokes

Why can't a feminist shoot a gun?

They can't handle the triggers.

What's the most common way to trigger a feminist?

Right away.