Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

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Person Jokes More Person Jokes

What do you call a person with no body and no nose?

Nobody knows.

Where does a person with one leg work?

IHOP

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What are the four words that you least want to hear, after having blown Willie Nelson?

I'm not Willie Nelson."

Why is China a communist country?

Because nobody wants to hold an erection.

2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

What did the 2 say to the 3?

Do you even, bro?

How many guitar players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

2 . One to screw it in and another to say, "I could do that".

Fry Jokes More Fry Jokes

What do you say to someone who studied media at university?

Can I have fries with that please?

What do you call an aardvark in a frying pan?

A lardvark!

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What do you call a guitarist without a girlfriend?

Homeless.

What do you get when ant's parents won't let him marry his girlfriend?

Antelopes.

1 Jokes More 1 Jokes

What do you call a man with a flamethrower?

2. What do you call his first victim 3. What do you call his second victim 1. Bernie 2. Crispin 3. Ash

How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?

100; 1 to do it, and 99 to say "I could do that."

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

Why don't Blacks and Mexicans have babies?

Their kids would be too lazy to steal.

What Did Kid Davis Say To The Lesbian Melons?

you cantaloupe. i just thought of this. probably not the first person to, but i certainly didn't steal it.

Learn Jokes More Learn Jokes

When are you going to learn to drive?

I don't think they feel very safe in my taxi.

What is the first nursery rhyme blondes learn in primary school?

A. Hump me dump me!!

Discipline Jokes More Discipline Jokes

Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

How do you discipline your pet rock?

You hit rock bottom!

Defend Jokes More Defend Jokes

How many men do you need to defend Paris?

I have no idea. Nobody ever tried.

How do the French defend a city?

We don't know, they've never tried it.