Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

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Person Jokes More Person Jokes

What do you call a person that raises the dead and also had a thing for napes?

A neck-romancer

Who is a Project Manager?

Project Manager is a person who believes that 9 women can deliver a baby in one month.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What are unicorns who want better working enviroments for their fellow employees?

Unioncorns.

Why do blondes put rulers on their foreheads?

A: They want to measure their intelligence.

2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

Why do you always need to take 2 baptists on a fishing trip instead of one?

If you take one, he'll drink all of your beer, If you take 2 neither will drink a drop

What do you call 2 Mexicans playing basketball?

Juan on Juan.

Fry Jokes More Fry Jokes

Why did the chicken cross the state line?

He just had to get out of there because he heard that Kentucky fried chicken!

How do you swat one hundred flies at the same time?

Smack an Ethiopian in the face with a frying pan.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What did the overbearing mother melon say to her son and his girlfriend?

You Cantaloupe.

What do you want for Christmas?

Me: a dragon! Santa: noo, be realistic Me: a girlfriend Santa: * cough * what color do you want your girlfriend

1 Jokes More 1 Jokes

What's DJ Khaled's favourite number?

11, Because it has another 1.

What are the three kinds of women's cancer?

1. Breast Cancer 2. Ovarian Cancer 3. Feminism

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

How do you steal a coat?

You jacket.

Why was the pirate fired from the babyGap?

For stealing the booty

Learn Jokes More Learn Jokes

What do Santa's little helpers learn in school?

The Elfabet!

Why can't Albert Einstein drive?

Because he never learned.

Discipline Jokes More Discipline Jokes

How do you discipline your pet rock?

You hit rock bottom!

Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

Defend Jokes More Defend Jokes

Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

Why is America bad at the game Chess?

Because they don't know how to defend their towers.