Jelly Jokes

What's the difference between jam and jelly?

You can't jelly someone into a wood chipper.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam?

Nobody would name their band Pearl Jelly.

What is a printer's favorite type of jelly?

Jelly's fine, but paper jam is the best!

What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a jelly ?

The collie wobbles !

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Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get if you cross a Sociologist with someone in the Mafia?

An offer you can't understand.

What do you get if you cross a jogger with an apple pie ?

Puff pastry !

Apple Jokes More Apple Jokes

What's the difference between a pretty girl and an apple?

One you squeeze to get cider, the other you get 'side her to squeeze.

What's the best way to milk a sheep?

Ask Apple.

Squash Jokes More Squash Jokes

What's the difference between squash and zucchini?

You can't zucchini bugs! A family-friendly take on the age old "jam VS jelly" joke.

What do monsters play when they are in the bus?

Squash.

Bug Jokes More Bug Jokes

Why wasn't there a Captain America movie tie in videogame?

Because every time one bug was fixed, 2 more appeared.

What do you call it when you grind your teeth because you are bugged you forgot your dental floss?

Flossless compression!

Fly Jokes More Fly Jokes

What keeps fish from flying of Niagara Falls?

They don't have a pilots license.

Why do vultures find it easy to fly?

They only ever have carrion baggage.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

Why was the London sperm bank so unsuccessful?

The were only two donors. One came on the bus, the other missed the tube.

What side of the American flag are the stars on?

Both sides. Came from my FIL on this Memorial Day.

Wobble Jokes More Wobble Jokes

What weebles and wobbles but can't get up?

Grandpa having a seizure. Bonus: Statistically speaking, 1 in 5 adult men

What lies in a pram and wobbles?

A jelly baby.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What happens in a battle between storm troopers and red shirts?

Star Trek) The storm troopers all miss, and the red shirts all die

What do you call a hundred year old man who dies in the library?

Overdue