Locksmith Jokes

Why are locksmiths in Japan cooler than the rest of the world's locksmiths?

Because in Japan they're rocksmiths.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Coffee Mug

Who are you and how did you get in here?

I'm a locksmith and I'm a locksmith.

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Inmate Jokes More Inmate Jokes

How do you tell the difference between the staff and the inmates at a psychiatric hospital?

The patients get better and leave. Not everyone of the patients thinks he is God. The staff have the keys!

What did the imprisoned locksmith say after he told the inmates a bunch of bad jokes?

I'll show myself out."

Key Jokes More Key Jokes

What's the key to a Pirate Opera?

The High Cs

What key won't let you through any doors?

A turkey.

Bunch Jokes More Bunch Jokes

What's the difference between a women's track team and a tribe of smart pygmies?

The pygmies are a bunch of cunning runts.

Why were a bunch of realist artists offended at a Matisse gallery opening?

They didn't like the public displays of abstraction.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What kind of dog can tell time?

A clockshund!

What are the three fastest forms of communication?

Telephone, telegraph, tell a woman.

Imprison Jokes More Imprison Jokes

Who let them out?

I PAID GOOD MONEY TO IMPRISON THEM

Why are trains always being falsely imprisoned?

A. Because of their loco motives

Rest Jokes More Rest Jokes

Why did the cops show up at the elementary school?

A 1st grader was resisting a rest.

What am I doing with the rest of my life?

I don't even know what I'm doing with the rest of this tweet...

Japan Jokes More Japan Jokes

Who's Angry in Japan?

The director of Life of Pi.

What do Japan and Shaq have in common?

Kobe Beef

Bad Joke Jokes More Bad Joke Jokes

What is the difference between a good joke and a bad joke?

Timing

What do you call a horse that makes bad jokes?

Unicorny