Morpheus Jokes

What rhymes with Pistorius?

His girlfriend certainly ain't Morpheus.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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What did Neo say when Morpheus said: "You've been living in a dreamworld Neo"?

I noe

What does Morpheus seek for paper cuts?

Neosporin.

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Neo Jokes More Neo Jokes

What did Neo say when Morpheus said: "You've been living in a dreamworld Neo"?

I noe

Why could Neo from the Matrix never be a Christian?

Because he has his own Hole-y Trinity -I'll see myself out

Paper Cut Jokes More Paper Cut Jokes

What bleeds once a month and has absolutely no sense of humor?

Me. I'm pretty clumsy so I get paper cuts pretty regularly.

What does Morpheus seek for paper cuts?

Neosporin.

Neosporin Jokes More Neosporin Jokes

What do you call old, expired Neosporin?

Paleosporin

What does Morpheus seek for paper cuts?

Neosporin.

Seek Jokes More Seek Jokes

Why do women aged 40+ not play hide and seek?

cause nobody would be looking for them.

What do you call a skeleton with blonde hair in a closet?

Last year's winner of the blonde "hide and go seek" contest

Live Jokes More Live Jokes

What lives in gum trees ?

Stick insects !

Why is Santa Claus always so happy?

He knows where all the bad girls live

Door Jokes More Door Jokes

What do you call a belt with a watch on it?

A waist of time *door closes on way out*

Why do pumpkins sit on people’s porches?

They have no hands to knock on the door.

Juan Jokes More Juan Jokes

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Juan (This probably has been posted earlier but is still funny )

How many Mexicans do you need working in the kitchen?

Just Juan.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

Why do you want to learn jujitsu?

Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.

Who's your Daddy?

In my excitement, I asked my girlfriend "How's your daddy " instead of "Who's your daddy " and now five hours later we're still talking about his diabetes...