Percent Jokes

What's the difference between the Pro Bowl and a typical church?

In the Pro Bowl, they give ten percent.

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What type of milk does Mitt Romney use with his cereal?

The one percent

Why do fifty percent of marriages end in divorce?

Well, I'm guessing it's because the other fifty percent can't afford lawyers.

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What do you call a deceptive feline?

A lion. Get it guys lol? Lion Lying I'll pounce myself out now...

What do you call lying furniture?

Untrustable

Juan Percent Jokes More Juan Percent Jokes

What do you call the top wealthiest people in Mexico?

The Juan percent.

What do you call rich Mexicans?

The Juan percent.

Easter Jokes More Easter Jokes

What does Rabbits and Eggs have in common ?

Easter

What's the opposite of Easter?

Wester

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

Why did the Mexican push his wife off the bridge?

Tequila

What were the Mexican crisps doing in the locked conference room?

It's nacho business!

End Jokes More End Jokes

Why did linkin park wrap themselves up in plastic wrap before they jumped off a cliff?

So in the end they didn't even splatter.

Whats a mans favorite word that starts with 'm' and ends in 'arriage'?

A miscarriage! This joke never gets old, just like the baby!

Guess Jokes More Guess Jokes

Where does Kylie buy her kebabs?

From Jason's Doner Van. (Sorry, I'm guessing this one's only for the Aussies and Brits)

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

for 2 weeks.

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What do bees use to do their hair?

Honeycombs!

How do you get your girlfriend to stop smoking?

Slow down and use some lube

Mexico Jokes More Mexico Jokes

Why does Mexico always underperform in the summer olympics?

Because everyone that can run, swim or jump is in USA.

Why doesn't Mexico have a team in the summer Olympics?

Because all the ones who can run, jump or swim are ready in the US.