How do you tell if someone is riding a bicycle for fitness or because they have a DUI?

The cigarette.

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

When do you know a lawyer is telling the truth?

When his lips are shut.

How can you tell if a woman's picture is photoshopped?

She isn't standing in the kitchen

Cigarette Jokes More Cigarette Jokes

Why did the man smoke a cigarette in Beijing?

To get some fresh air

What're you in for?

I had a solid tweet *takes drag off cigarette* and no one faved it. I just lost it." "We've all been there, brother."

Bicycle Jokes More Bicycle Jokes

Why did the unicycle win the race?

Because the bicycle was two tired.

What's the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle, and a poorly dressed man on a bicycle?

Attire.

Ride Jokes More Ride Jokes

What does Fozzie the Bear do when he can't find a ride?

Walk-a Walk-a

What did the snail say as he rode on the back of a turtle?

A: Wheeee!

Fitness Jokes More Fitness Jokes

How much did the obese man know about fitness?

Diddly squat

How do you tell if someone is riding a bicycle for fitness or because they have a DUI?

The cigarette.

Dui Jokes More Dui Jokes

How do you tell if someone is riding a bicycle for fitness or because they have a DUI?

The cigarette.

Why did the horse get a DUI?

She had too many maretinis