How many bricks do you need to screw in a lightbulb?

Just two, but you're going to need a lot of patience and light bulbs.

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Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many SRSers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They wait for the electrician to make a mistake and yell at them for doing it wrong.

How many literalists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One.

Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Fish.

How many Narcissists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. But he doesn't screw it in, he just holds it and the world revolves around him.

Light Jokes More Light Jokes

What do light and hard have in common?

You can sleep with a light on.

What are red heads good for?

Lighting fires.

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many schoolteachers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Anything not completed during the lesson is added to the homework.

How many Ferguson protesters does it take to change a light bulb?

None they can't change anything.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

What's the main thing a woman needs to think about when considering a potential boyfriend?

Is this the man I want my kids to spend every second weekend with?

What does a stock broker and a gym rat have in common?

NEED MORE GAINS

Brick Jokes More Brick Jokes

What do a brick and I have in common?

We both get laid by hand.

How many bricks do you need to screw in a lightbulb?

Just two, but you're going to need a lot of patience and light bulbs.

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

Why do black people wear lots of chains?

It's a habit that stuck from when they were slaves.

How many dogs does it take to count 14 plates?

14, maybe 15, but only if the plates ... 'run around a lot!'

Patience Jokes More Patience Jokes

How many bricks do you need to screw in a lightbulb?

Just two, but you're going to need a lot of patience and light bulbs.

What is a doctor's most important quality?

Patience!