How's the wife?

Me:Glowing Neighbour:Pregnant Me:No, she's on fire, just going for more wood Neighbour:You're sick Me:You're next

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did Patrick Stewart say when he proposed to his wife?

Engage.

What did the executioner say to his wife when he left?

I'll beheading out now.

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

What do you call a rifle that fires 3 bullets at once?

A trifle!

What did the ruthless businessman say to his employees?

If at first you don't succeed - you're fired!

Glow Jokes More Glow Jokes

How many survivors of nuclear war does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. People that glow in the dark don't need lights.

How many people from Chernobyl does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. They glow in the dark.

Neighbour Jokes More Neighbour Jokes

What lives in the ocean is grouchy and hates neighbours ?

A hermit crab !

Why did the sheep move house?

The neighbours were baaastsrds.

Pregnant Jokes More Pregnant Jokes

What spell does a Hogwarts student use when they pregnant?

fetus deletus!

What's the difference between OP and a Pregnant woman?

She delivers.

Sick Jokes More Sick Jokes

How crazy is your ex?

Crazy like my triceps " "How sick is your mother Sick like my triceps "

How's the wife?

Me:Glowing Neighbour:Pregnant Me:No, she's on fire, just going for more wood Neighbour:You're sick Me:You're next