What did the man who survived a javelin headwound say to his opponent?

Thanks for opening my mind.

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why are there so many more men in the military?

Because ladies go in first.

Why did the lady at the bar slap the man next to her for stroking his mustache?

Because in between stroking it, he said "hello, let me clear you off a place to sit."

Thank Jokes More Thank Jokes

Who am I to argue?

So I thanked him and went back home.

How do feminists screw in a lightbulb?

By holding the bulb up to the socket and waiting for the world to revolve around them EDIT: Rip inbox EDIT 2: Thanks for the gold!

Mind Jokes More Mind Jokes

What's on your mind?

it's like dating someone with low self-esteem.

What do you call a bee that can't make up its mind?

A maybe.

Open Jokes More Open Jokes

What did the guy without hands get for christmas?

We don't know, he hasn't opened the present yet

Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge?

She saw the salad dressing.

Survive Jokes More Survive Jokes

Who survives?

America.

What do u call a Mexican who survives a shootout and lives to tell the tale?

The Juan who lived.

Opponent Jokes More Opponent Jokes

How did the OBGYN win the election?

He was able to stirrup some controversy about his opponent with his effective smear campaign.

How did the baker put his opponent in checkmate?

with an en croissant