What do you call a belt with a watch on it?

A waist of time *door closes on way out*

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Door Jokes More Door Jokes

Who's...(loud crash as a battering ram demolishes the front door)...there?

We're the Ferguson Police Department. We ask the questions.

Why couldn't the cat walk through the door?

it had a javelin through it's head.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What is the best stand-up routine of our time?

I nominate Chris Rock's Never Scared.

How can you tell baseball players are smarter than football players?

When was the last time you saw a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field?

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

What 2 books do white American boys enjoy reading on their way to school?

The Catcher in the Rye and Cooking For Dummies.

What did you like most about your last job?

ME: *leans in way too close* Leaving it.

Belt Jokes More Belt Jokes

What's the difference between an Irish Catholic and a Roman Catholic?

A few notches on the belt buckle.

What did Whitney Houston's coroner say as he unbuckled his belt?

It's not right, but it's OK

Close Jokes More Close Jokes

Why do think that?

The boy responds "Because he closes his eyes when he kisses me."

Why was Jesus a virgin when he died?

Every time he touched a "wound" it closed.

Waist Jokes More Waist Jokes

What do you call a woman who is paralyzed from the waist down?

Wife.

What do you call a belt made of dollar bills?

A waist of money.