Belt Jokes

What did the obese man say about the belt he'd recently purchased?

Top notch.

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What does a belt like to do?

Getting Waisted

What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time...

How do you tell if someone is a safety engineer?

They are wearing suspenders and a belt.

Why did the belt get locked up?

A: He held up a pair of pants.

What's the difference between an Irish Catholic and a Roman Catholic?

A few notches on the belt buckle.

Why did the belt get arrested?

Because it held up a pair of pants. I'll show myself out.

What does the zero say to the eight?

I like your belt. Ok, ok. I know it's elementary, but I still love it.

What did the hat say to the belt?

You hang around I'll go on ahead

What did Whitney Houston's coroner say as he unbuckled his belt?

It's not right, but it's OK

Why shouldn't you wear a watch on your belt?

It'd be a waste of time.

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Why is your voice gone?

Are you ok Me:*thinks back to me belting out Ariana Grande's "Dangerous Woman"* I'm ok...allergies are bad.

What are the three biggest lies an Oklahoma State fan tells?

I WON this belt buckle, I OWN that truck, and I swear to God I was just helping that sheep over the fence.

Why is wrestling stupid?

It's a bunch of guy's without pants fighting for a belt....

What did 0 say to 8?

Why's your belt so tight bruh

What do you call a belt with a watch on it?

A waist of time *door closes on way out*

What did the number zero say to the number 8?

I like your belt

How can you tell who is a blonde's boyfriend?

A: He's the one with the belt buckle that matches the impression in her forehead.

Why, Bro?

B1: Men with no pants... Fighting for a belt... WTF

Why bro?

Men with no pants fighting for a belt.. WTF

What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time.

Why did the belt go to prison?

He held up a pair of pants!

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Clock Jokes More Clock Jokes

What does that clock say at 1 o'clock night?

1 AM feeling very sleepy.

What do you call it when water is poured over a clock?

Time dilution.

Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What's a man's idea of a perfect date?

A woman who answers the door stark naked holding a six pack.

What did the russian soldier say when he held his newborn sibling in his hands for the first time?

You're my brother in arms!"

Notch Jokes More Notch Jokes

What's the difference between an Irish Catholic and a Roman Catholic?

A few notches on the belt buckle.

What did the obese man say about the belt he'd recently purchased?

Top notch.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why does Waldo wear stripes?

Because he doesn't want to be spotted

What did the ghost wearing sox say?

Shhoooooooooooooeeeeeesss!! Shoooooooooooooooooose !

Pant Jokes More Pant Jokes

Why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?

The pirate says, "I don't know, but it's driving me nuts!"

What are the best clothes to wear to the dance club?

Boots and pants and boots and pants and boots and pants...

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why did the man who robbed the liquor store with a boomerang get caught?

Because he couldn't throw away the evidence

Whats a mans favorite word that starts with 'm' and ends in 'arriage'?

A miscarriage! This joke never gets old, just like the baby!

Arrest Jokes More Arrest Jokes

Why did Snoop Dogg get arrested?

Embezzlement

How many American cops does it take to change a broken lightbulb?

Two. One to arrest the room for being black, and the other to arrest the bulb for being broke.

Zero Jokes More Zero Jokes

How many redditors does it take to screw in a new lightbulb?

Zero. Somebody already did it.

How many zeros in one million?

Six" "Ok, thanks" *writes milli000000n*