What drives you?

Me: The bus mostly Interviewer: I mean what motivates you to get out of bed in the morning M: missing the bus

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Miss Jokes More Miss Jokes

What did Matthew McConaughey yell at the drive that was about to miss his turn?

A right a right a right!

What's missing from star wars 7?

Maybe SPOILER Nobody's limbs.

Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

When does a bed grow longer?

A: At night, because two feet are added to it.

Why can't you sniff out Easter Eggs?

In a tone like you have no idea) "No bunny nose" -Made up this morning in bed to a very dissatisfied girlfriend

Bus Jokes More Bus Jokes

What do you call a secret agent running for the bus?

A Russian spy.

What did granny say after leaving her handbag on a bus?

Allahu Akbar!" I'm going to hell for this.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why do Norwegians drive Chevys?

They're afraid of drowning in a Fjord.

Where do we go?

Me: Left Axl: Where do we go now Me: Straight. Axl: Oh, where do we go now Me: Damn it, Axl, let me drive!

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

What does it mean if holy water sizzles when it hits your skin?

I'm just asking for a friend)

Why are statistics more believable with a larger sample size?

The Ns justify the means.

Interviewer Jokes More Interviewer Jokes

Who inspires you?

ME: Peter Piper. INTERVIEWER: What does he do ME: It's difficult to say.

What's your strength?

Candidate: I fall in love easily. Interviewer: What's your weakness? Candidate: Those blue eyes of yours.

Motivate Jokes More Motivate Jokes

What does a Mexican carpet fitter say to motivate his colleagues?

Underlay! Underlay!

What did the philosophically-wise Mongol general say to motivate himself?

I'm not Immanuel Kant. I'm Genghis Kahn!