What kind of soldier doesn't need bullets?

The kind of soldier that's always shooting his mouth off.

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Bullet Jokes More Bullet Jokes

What is Oscar Pistorius's new favourite band?

Bullets For My Valentine

What will it take to reunite Nirvana?

Two more bullets.

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

Why did Bowie die?

I guess he was shot through the heart

Why are American police officers so bad at snooker?

They always shoot the black

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why the hell did you buy a buffalo?

Me: I'd rather have a buffalo and not need it than need a buffalo and not have it.

What does the twitter bird do when it needs money?

It goes to Twerk!

Mouth Jokes More Mouth Jokes

What do you call a dwarf without a mouth?

Short for words.

What's the difference between an M&amp?

M and a tiny mute in your tuna sandwich screaming for help? One melts in your mouth, one mouths in your melt.

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of fun does a priest have?

Nun.

What kind of shoes does a thief wear?

Sneakers

Soldier Jokes More Soldier Jokes

Why did the Romans pay their soldiers in salt?

So they would end up with seasoned veterans.

How do you drive this thing?

Two soldiers are in a tank. One turns to the other and says "GLUGGLUGBLUGBWOOABB"