What's that pig doing in the middle of the road with a red light on its head?

Didn't you tell me to put out a stop swine

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Red Light Jokes More Red Light Jokes

What is a NYC nanosecond?

If you are stuck at a red light, its the time that it takes for the occupant of the car behind you to honk his horn when the light turns green.

Why do we have to sit at red lights if nobody's coming the other way?

We don't have to pay our taxes if nobody's checking, right

Middle Jokes More Middle Jokes

What's worse than stepping on a Lego in the middle of the night?

A landmine.

How much is half of 8 Pupil: Up and down or across ?

Teacher: What do you mean Pupil: Wellup and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did Ash tell his Pokemon?

Pokemon Go!

What did the hipster say... ...when he was told to get off the couch?

Nah-imma-stay"

Road Jokes More Road Jokes

Why did the punk-rocker cross the road?

He had a chicken stapled to his face.

Why did the Chinese chicken cross the road?

The eggrolled

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What has long ears four legs and is worn on your head?

An Easter bunnet!

Why did kurt pull the trigger?

He couldn't get hole out of his head

Pig Jokes More Pig Jokes

What did the pig do when a beetle landed in his feed trough?

He ate it quickly before the others could ask him to share.

What do you call a pig with three eyes?

Piiig