What's the worst news for a NASCAR driver before a race?

The track is alright."

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Race Jokes More Race Jokes

Why did the Boston Marathon runner collapse before finishing the race?

WTF ) His thighs were burning too bad.

What do you call an alligator that wins a race?

A chompion. (7-year old me thought he was very clever.)

Nascar Jokes More Nascar Jokes

Why can't mites race in NASCAR?

Because mites make rights, not lefts.

Why did the kid with muscular dystrophy want to be an astronaut, a doctor, a lawyer, and a NASCAR driver when he grew up?

He had a lot of aspirations.

Bad News Jokes More Bad News Jokes

What's the bad news?

Asked the patients. "You only have 24-hours to live." "And the really bad news " I should have told you yesterday.

What if the Bad News Bears literally gave you bad news?

Bear 1: You're adopted Bear 2: The cancer is terminal Bear 3: This tweet ain't funny

Track Jokes More Track Jokes

How do beer companies track their sales?

On dos axes

What do Limas Sweed and Bruce Jenner have in common?

Neither can keep track of their balls

Nascar Driver Jokes More Nascar Driver Jokes

Why did the kid with muscular dystrophy want to be an astronaut, a doctor, a lawyer, and a NASCAR driver when he grew up?

He had a lot of aspirations.

What's the worst news for a NASCAR driver before a race?

The track is alright."