How long does it take a baby to die in the microwave?

I don't know, I lose track of time when I have an erection.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why are you being so salty?

Her response - with a flat, even look: "I've been well seasoned." I lost it

What method did SFML perform when the Human lost to the AI?

Text.GetRect()

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What's the best/worst dirty joke you know?

In honor of the recent joke trends I ask you what is the dirtiest joke you know?

What's yellow and lies in a pond?

Disclaimer: I don't know how well this joke will work in english. What's yellow and lies in a pond? An excevator. You don't think this is funny? Neither does the operator.

Erection Jokes More Erection Jokes

What kind of an erection does a necrophiliac get?

Mourning wood! :)

What do you get when you throw a baby against a wall?

An erection

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

Why can't clocks keep secrets?

Because, time will always tell.

Why is 'The Game' the most powerful rapper?

Because you lose every time you talk about him ( )

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Why do monks wear the same clothes every day?

Because old habits die hard.

What is cold, grey, and ugly?

Me after I take all the Nyquil and die. Also, Janet Reno.

Microwave Jokes More Microwave Jokes

What scratches the window before it explodes?

A baby in a microwave

What washes up on tiny beaches?

Microwaves.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

How do you keep an imbecile happy all his life ?

Tell him a joke when he's a baby !

What's black and taps on the window?

A baby in the microwave :)

Track Jokes More Track Jokes

Who has time to monitor followers/unfollowers?

I can barely keep track of my kids and I only have 1 of those. Wait. Two. I have 2 kids.

How did Godzilla escape the trains?

He threw them off their tracks.