What's this bit here?

NURSE: ...his heart ME: Hm. NURSE: Your resume said you were a surgeon ME: My resume says a lot of things

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Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Why is Nicolas Cage's radio so loud?

He doesn't know how to turn things down

When my family says things like...why don't you have kids yet?

I say "Because I didn't get drunk & do the football team, Sasha."

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

How Does Snoop Dogg Do His Laundry?

He uses a lot of BLEAYOTCH!

Why did the man with an electric car think he had a dual exhaust?

He drank a lot of beer. He ate a lot of beans. *You love it.*

Heart Jokes More Heart Jokes

What did the pig say when his wife left him?

Don't go bacon my heart"

Why is the food so cold and bland?

Dad: Because your mother put her heart and soul into it.

Nurse Jokes More Nurse Jokes

What the difference between a nun in a bathtub & a nurse in the bathtub?

One has soul full of hope & one has a hole full of soap... I'll walk myself out, sorry first post here

What are we waiting for?

the doctor asks. "Patients, Doctor," replied the nurse. "Patients."

Surgeon Jokes More Surgeon Jokes

What did the surgeon tell Michael Jackson before he changed his skin colour?

Everything's gonna be all white.

What's so funny?

asks the dermatologist. "Sorry, it's a inside joke." replies the surgeon.

Resume Jokes More Resume Jokes

Whats the most common work of fiction?

The average persons resume

How am I not qualified?

Your resume is a stick figure and a poorly drawn igloo "It's a cat actually"