What's white in the morning, white in the afternoon and white in the evening?

An Irishman trying to get a tan.

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

How to make your ears pop?

Try some sparkly earrings.

What's red, 10 inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry when I try to put it in her mouth?

Her miscarriage. sorry.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

What is the definition of torque?

When you wake up in the morning with an erection so stiff, that when you bend it down to take a leak, your legs kick back and you hit your head on the toilet.

The Sergeant-Major growled at the young soldier: I didn’t see you at camouflage training this morning.

Thank you very much, sir.

Irishman Jokes More Irishman Jokes

What do you call an Irishman who can't hold his liquor?

OC A quadriplegic.

What did the drunken Irishman say to the Chinese diplomat?

http://www.reddit.com/r/Youwritethepunchline/comments/2zg1zy/whatdidthedrunkenirishmansaytothechinese/

Evening Jokes More Evening Jokes

What's the opposite of evening?

unevening.

What cuts four farts in the morning, two farts at midday, and three farts in the evening?

A sphinxter.

Tan Jokes More Tan Jokes

What do triangles do in the summer?

They tan.

What's worse than being a tanning salon owner in Africa?

Being a Somali Uber driver in Columbus, Ohio.

Afternoon Jokes More Afternoon Jokes

Why is it dangerous to go into the jungle between two and four in the afternoon?

That's when dinosaurs are jumping out of palm trees.

What do you get when you spend all afternoon replying to your anonymous feedback on Corpell Anonymous Box?

Corpell tunnel syndrome