What weighs more than a car and uses a lot of fuel, but hardly ever moves?

Your mom.

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Car Jokes More Car Jokes

Why do cars slow down when they see a cop has pulled someone over?

HE'S A LITTLE BUSY TO WORRY ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW DUMMIES

Why did the spider buy a car ?

So he could take it out for a spin !

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What do French Business Men use to ice their cakes?

Franchicing

What will they now use on photos for LGBT magazines?

an airbroosh

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

How dare you complain about your life?

Someone's mom is Snooki.

What did the little ghost give his mom for Mother's Day?

A booquet of flowers.

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

Why did the Redditors like when a tornado hit a fence?

There was a lot of reposting to do

What do you call the offspring of a black man and an octopus?

I don't know but it sure can pick a lot of cotton.

Fuel Jokes More Fuel Jokes

What fuels electronics but drains a relationship?

Battery

What kind of Fuel does the Iron Giant run on?

Vin Diesel!

Weigh Jokes More Weigh Jokes

What's blue and doesn't weigh much?

Light blue

Which country's currency weighs as much as it's worth?

Australia. Because five $0.20 coins are about half a pound.