Why are you hitting that spider?

wife: I don't like spiders me: Ooooh *grabs newspaper* mother-in-law leaving I don't have to take this

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

How do crabs leave the hospital?

On crotches...

Who's there ! Arbus ! Arbus who ?

Arbus leaves in 5 minutes

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What do you call a horse who likes to carry all the groceries?

A one trip pony :D

What do you say to an art student with a job?

Uhh, I would like the Quarter Pounder with Cheese"

Hit Jokes More Hit Jokes

What do you do when you want to golf in a thunderstorm?

Hold up a 1 Iron. Not even God can hit a 1 iron.

What do they call number 17 in black jack ?

The stepmother, because sometimes you want to hit her, even though you shouldn't

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

Why does a mother carry her baby?

The baby can't carry the mother.

What do you call a cow with two legs?

Your mother!

Law Jokes More Law Jokes

How do women defy the laws of physics?

The heavier they are, the easier to pick up!

What's a Buddhist's favorite physics law?

Om's Law.

Spider Jokes More Spider Jokes

What did the spider say when he broke his new web ?

Darn it !

What do you call a spider that wants to overthrow the government?

An anarchid.