Why are you letting people touch your new born?

I don't let people touch my new iPhone

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Let Jokes More Let Jokes

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a light bulb?

Lets go play on our bikes.

What did the hen say to his bar pals?

Let's get some chicks!

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why do cemeteries have fences?

Because people are dying to get in.

How do people in other countries tell if kids are using drugs?

Here in the U.S. we just ask them how many grams are in an ounce.

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

What if the Bad News Bears literally gave you bad news?

Bear 1: You're adopted Bear 2: The cancer is terminal Bear 3: This tweet ain't funny

What is a guy who rubs bear toes called?

Rob...wait for it... erto! Rubeartoe!

I Phone Jokes More I Phone Jokes

What's your cell phone?

iPhone. - No, I meant the number. - It's a 6. - No, to contact you. - I don't use it for that.

What's 6" long, bent to the left, and in the front of my pants??

My iPhone 6.

Touch Jokes More Touch Jokes

Where do you touch a woman to give yourself the most pleasure?

The back of her head.

What happens when your scrotum touches the edge of the toilet bowl?

Ebowla.

New I Phone Jokes More New I Phone Jokes

Why are you letting people touch your new born?

I don't let people touch my new iPhone

Why are the new iPhones so skinny?

To match their hipster owners' jeans.