Why did Jesus quit playing ice hockey?

He kept getting nailed to the boards.

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Play Jokes More Play Jokes

What game do you play if you don't take care of your teeth?

Tooth (truth) or Consequences.

What do you get if you play a country music song backwards?

You get your wife back. Your house back. Your truck back. Your dog back...

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What did Judas say after capturing Jesus?

Nailed it.

Why did Mary Magdalen love Jesus?

Because he was hung like this

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

How do we know Jesus wasn't a virgin?

Because he got nailed three times.

What's in your mom's tummy?

5-year-old: A baby. Woman: What kind of baby 5-year-old: A human one. Nailed it.

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did the doctor quit his job?

He ran out of patients.

Why did the mountain climber quit halfway through his climb?

He really wasn't feeling up to it.

Board Jokes More Board Jokes

What did one dry erase marker say to the other?

I'm bored! (As in board) Another one from my 9 year-old.

Why do they call boats "she"?

Because the wives had to get on board somehow.

Ice Hockey Jokes More Ice Hockey Jokes

How does Jerry Seinfeld play ice hockey?

With his Shtick.

Why did Jesus quit playing ice hockey?

He kept getting nailed to the boards.