Why did the mathematician quit his job and join NASCAR?

They told him he was good at deriving

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What do you say to a woman with one black eye?

Nothing, you've already told her.

Whats the difference between you and an orphan?

You were adopted. Best told to siblings :D

Join Jokes More Join Jokes

Why did the little pig try to join the Navy?

He loved to sing "Oinkers Aweight"

Why did the chemist join the Pentecostal church?

He wanted to speak in tungsten.

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why did the apple pie get fired from his job?

Because he showed up baked.

What do Apple and the US economy have in common now?

No Jobs

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Why did Chris Benoit quit wrestling?

He wanted to hang with his family.

What did the momma hawk say to her chicks?

Quit falcon around or get the flock outta here!

Mathematician Jokes More Mathematician Jokes

How could you tell that the figure skater was a mathematician?

Because of the Fibonacci sequins.

What do mathematicians drink?

Anything to ease the pain.

Derive Jokes More Derive Jokes

Why wouldn't you hire bears from Australia?

Because they don't have the necessary koalafications. (Derived from: )

Why shouldn't you drink at a math party?

Because you shouldn't drink and derive.

Nascar Jokes More Nascar Jokes

How did NASCAR get that name?

Redneck: 'That's nascar ye got there."

What does NASCAR stand for?

Non-athletic-sport-centered-around-rednecks (I heard this forever ago and wanted to share. Sorry if it happens to be a repost.)