Why did the atoms cross the road?

It was time to split.

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Road Jokes More Road Jokes

Why did the one-armed man cross the road?

To get to the second-hand shop.

Why did the whale cross the road?

To get to the other tide.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why did Kelly Clarkson cross the road?

Because of you.

What do you get when you cross a Texas Aggie with an ape?

A retarded ape.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What did the table fan say to his boss when he couldn't get to work on time?

Ah-so-late!

What does a Chicago police officer and a professional skateboarder have in common?

They both shred footage. (*be gentle, it's my first time.*)

Split Jokes More Split Jokes

What do you call it when stoners split a check?

High finance.

Why did the programmer's girlfriend move back home so quickly?

She returned because all he ever did was split her in the middle for log(n) time.

Atom Jokes More Atom Jokes

How does an atom with bad grammar respond to an order?

I on it.

What is the similarities between Bernie Madoff and Atoms?

They both make up everything!