Why did the man quit his job at the helium gas factory?

He didn't like being spoken to in that voice

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do you call a man with a toe on his knee?

Tony

Whats the difference between a man and a government bond?

The bond matures.

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What do snotty vegetables do when they see something they don't like ?

They 'turnip' their noses.

Why your fingers have spaces in between?

nothing!why? would you like it to be very close to each other. You're not a duck!

Speak Jokes More Speak Jokes

What do you get when cross the Dukes of Hazzard car with K.I.T.T. ?

General Lee speaking.

What's the most 'Spoken' language on Earth?

Hint: It's not English Spanish.

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

How long were you at your last job?

A: "Seven-and-a-half inches... same as now"

Who gets the job of writing the fortunes in the cookies?

I want that job. I could really screw with some people.

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did the cyclops quit teaching?

He had only one pupil.

Why did the cross eyed teacher quit her job?

Because she couldn't control her pupils.

Voice Jokes More Voice Jokes

Why did the man quit his job at the helium gas factory?

He didn't like being spoken to in that voice

Why is your voice gone?

Are you ok Me:*thinks back to me belting out Ariana Grande's "Dangerous Woman"* I'm ok...allergies are bad.