Why did the man quit his job at the helium gas factory?

He didn't like being spoken to in that voice

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Whats the odd one out ?

The man on the moon? Santa Claus? Or an honest Lawyer? Yes you got it Santa. The other two are figments of the imagination.

What do you call a man who opens the car door for you?

A chauffeur.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

Why does Tom Hiddleston only invite his closest friends/family to his birthday?

He likes to keep things low key.

Why do bears hate shoes so much?

They like to run around in their bear feet.

Speak Jokes More Speak Jokes

How do cats speak to people?

They commeownicate.

How can you tell if a parrot is intelligent?

It speaks in Polly-syllables!

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why did the doctor lose his job?

He lost his patience

How do you make a motherboard?

I asked him. He said, "Tell her about my job."

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did the programmer quit his job?

Because he didn't get arrays.

Why did the alcoholic quit his acting career when the audience jeered at him?

He couldn't handle his boos.

Voice Jokes More Voice Jokes

What happened when the owl lost his voice ?

He didn't give a hoot !

Why does everyone agree when you judge someone's voice?

Because you make sound judgement.