Why did the man quit his job at the helium gas factory?

He didn't like being spoken to in that voice

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What did the man say while holding a square clock?

I'm holding Time Square!

What is an independent variable?

Student: A variable who don't need no man

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What do you get when you cross a ghoul and a vampire?

A hemogoblin. I came up with this during lecture after a dyslexic moment, thought someone may like it.

Why did the Smackhead kick the habit?

He didn't like nuns.

Speak Jokes More Speak Jokes

What paper product speaks really quickly?

Wrapping paper.

What did the guy with 6 children say to the guy with six felonies?

I don't know they were speaking Spanish.

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why cant a Gorilla get a job?

BECAUSE HE'S BLACK

Why did the cross eyed teacher quit her job?

Because she couldn't control her pupils.

Quit Jokes More Quit Jokes

Why did Julius Caesar want to quit politics?

All that backstabbing was too much for him.

What does a retired Olympic sprinter have in common with Bernie Sanders?

He quit running.

Voice Jokes More Voice Jokes

What do you call your GPS if it has the voice of Terry Crews?

Crews Control.

Why is your voice gone?

Are you ok Me:*thinks back to me belting out Ariana Grande's "Dangerous Woman"* I'm ok...allergies are bad.