Why did the man take a pencil to bed ?

To draw the curtains !

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed ?

When your nose touches the ceiling !

Why did the Italian get thrown out of the hotel?

He said "I wanna two sheet onna the bed".

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why do girls make a "shhhhh" noise while peeing and men don't?

Cos men have a 6 inch silencer.

Why couldn't Hillary win the election?

Women only win .7 votes for every one a man wins.

Pencil Jokes More Pencil Jokes

Why do math teachers never get constipated?

Because they always work problems out with a pencil.

How do mathematicians cure constipation?

They work it out with a pencil.

Draw Jokes More Draw Jokes

Why do artists never win when they play football ?

They keep drawing !

My older brother always tore the last pages of my comic books, and never told me why.

I had to draw my own conclusions.

Curtain Jokes More Curtain Jokes

How many vampires does it take to open the Curtain on Daylight?

Just one with depression.

Why did the frat boy throw away his curtains?

He was trying to get some Natural Light.