Why shouldn't you carry two half dollars in your pocket?

Because two halves make a whole (hole) and you could lose your money.

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Why did Mike Dukakis lose the 1998 Presidential election?

He TANKED his campaign!

What is Apple's CEO's favourite TV show?

Lost

Hole Jokes More Hole Jokes

How do soldiers tell if a woman is a genuine Red-Head?

If it's red on top, fire in the hole.

Why do golfers wear 2 pairs of pants?

Incase he gets a hole in one

Carry Jokes More Carry Jokes

What do two owl brothers say when they are carrying something?

To me, to hoo.

What's dumber than a box of rocks?

The hippie carrying it. What's dumber than that? The yuppie buying it. What's dumber than that? The box of rocks

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

What is the quickest way to double your money ?

Fold it in half !

How does a mathematician ask for money?

Give me 10! dollars

Pocket Jokes More Pocket Jokes

What did the kangaroo say when her baby was missing?

Help! My pocket's been picked!

Why is paper money more valuable than coins?

When you put it in your pocket you double it and when you take it out you find it in creases. -

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

Why can't Zeno seem to pay his bar tab in full?

Answer: Because he kept giving half of what he owes.

What did Michael Jackson have in common with Target?

Boys clothes half off.