Why would you stay friends with an ex-girlfriend?

When you get fired from a job, you don't stay around and watch other people do your job.

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People Jokes More People Jokes

What do people in Arkansas do for Halloween?

Pump kin.

What do people and pizza have in common?

If they're black, they can't feed a family.

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

What's the hottest thing in China right now?

A Tibetan monk on fire.

Why do we live in a society where pizza arrives faster than police do?

Because the pizza guy has consequences for not doing his job correctly. "Oh damn, shots fired!" But not by the pizza guy.

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

What happens when your friend from Prague topples over?

You right a Czech.

Why did the kiddie pool have no friends?

Because it was too shallow.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

Why did the moron think his girlfriend was into metal?

He found steel wool pads in her bathroom.

Why doesn't Ed have a girlfriend?

Because Sheeran

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

What type of movie does a blind person watch?

Black and black movies.

What phrase would a neckbeard who watches South Park use the most?

M'Kay

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

Why do chemists love bad jokes?

Their jobs get a lot easier when there are no reactions

What did you like best about your last job?

Sometimes, people had birthdays and there was free cake."

Stay Jokes More Stay Jokes

What's your favorite part about being a stay-at-home mom?

Me: Showering is optional Her: HAHAHA, be serious. Me: Ok, no drug tests.

What did the hippie say when his girlfriend told him to move out?

Nah, I'm a stay. (namaste)

Ex Jokes More Ex Jokes

What is it called when you call your ex?

Ex-communication

What is the difference between my ex-girlfriend and a beer?

One is pale, bitter and starts off with lots of head and the other one is a beer.