Astronomy Jokes

What's the difference between astronomy and gastronomy?

Astronomy is about things too big to wrap your head around, while gastronomy is about things small enough to wrap your head around.

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What do you get when you cross astronomy and cosmology with a dyslexic girl at starbucks?

Astrology, cosmetology, and a pumpkin space latte

What's the difference between astronomy & astrology?

Me: Approximately 50-60 IQ points.

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Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

How does a woman apologize to a man?

I'm sorry, but it's your fault.

What do you tell a women with two black eyes?

Nothing, you already told her twice.

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

How many Nickelback fans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Trick question! There's no such thing as Nickelback fans. (I will be hated by few)

What did Shakespeare say when asked how his wife keeps things interesting?

Anne hath a way."

Gastronomy Jokes More Gastronomy Jokes

What does a chef and a gravitational wave astronomer have in common?

They both work in gastronomy

What's the difference between astronomy and gastronomy?

Astronomy is about things too big to wrap your head around, while gastronomy is about things small enough to wrap your head around.

End Jokes More End Jokes

Did you hear about the two silk worms in a race?

It ended in a tie.

What did one slice of bread say to the other at the end of a game of chess?

It's stale, mate."

Telescope Jokes More Telescope Jokes

Where are all the women in amateur astronomy?

At the other end of the telescope.

What is the singular form of binoculars?

telescope

Head Jokes More Head Jokes

What did the fish say when it bumped its head?

Dam.

What's wrongdad?

Dad: I told you, my head hurts. Son: This is why mom left.

Starbuck Jokes More Starbuck Jokes

What, I'm Asian?

slides off Uggs & infinity scarf inside Starbucks* *buys a bonsai tree*

Why do teenage girls hangout in odd-sized groups at Starbucks?

Because they can't even.

Wrap Jokes More Wrap Jokes

How much should I trim off the back?

Me: Leave it long enough for him to wrap around his fist twice.

What did the psychiatrist say to the crazy naked guy wrapped in cellophane?

Clearly, I can see your nuts.