Behead Jokes

What did the executioner say to his wife when he left?

I'll beheading out now.

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What do you call the boyfriend of a beheaded prositute?

The headless whore's man

This joke may have profanity.

Why did Marie Antoinette travel the world?

Where else would she beheaded

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World Jokes More World Jokes

What do you call the smallest Superman in the world?

Quark Kent.

Why are men afraid of the world?

They spend 9 months trying to get out of a woman and the rest of their life trying to get back in.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What does a ship weigh when she leaves for a journey?

Anchor.

What does a suicidal person say while leaving a party?

I want to hang by myself for a bit. Edit: Not suicidal. Just gallows humor.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What's the definition of a Polygamist?

Pupil: A parrot with more than one wife!

How did a blind man meet his wife?

A: On a blind date!

Executioner Jokes More Executioner Jokes

Why is an executioner a terrible high-fiver?

He always leaves you hanging

What did the executioner say to his wife when he left?

I'll beheading out now.

Travel Jokes More Travel Jokes

Why does LeVar Burton not like to travel by airplane?

He usually flies twice as high.

Why did the Siamese Twins travel to England?

So the other one could drive