Executioner Jokes

What did the executioner say to his wife when he left?

I'll beheading out now.

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What did the executioner say to the prisoner?

Hang on a minute."

How does the executioner like his coffee?

Decap

Why is an executioner a terrible high-fiver?

He always leaves you hanging

How did the executioner learn about knots?

By watching the noose.

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Remove Jokes More Remove Jokes

What's the difference between a mod and a banana?

removed

What is a YouTube Heroes favorite comment?

removed

Noose Jokes More Noose Jokes

How did the executioner learn about knots?

By watching the noose.

What do you call a married knot?

Monotonous. Bonus answer from my wife: a noose.

Shoulder Jokes More Shoulder Jokes

Why are Australians so well balanced?

They have a chip on both shoulders.

How did the media find out that princess Diana had dandruff?

They saw her head and shoulders in the glove compartment

Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

Why is depressed clothing so convenient?

It hangs itself

What do you call four black guys hanging in a barn?

Antique farm equipment.

Saudi Jokes More Saudi Jokes

Why did the Saudi restaurant get in trouble?

They put the Umm Ali next to the Baba Ghanoush.

What does the Saudi Paralympics team consist of?

thieves..

Shock Jokes More Shock Jokes

What's a prison executioners favorite beer?

Shock-top

How can you attract a group of like minded friends?

This clique bait will shock you!

Post Jokes More Post Jokes

How many redditors does it take to post a joke to /r/Jokes?

Three. One to post it, another to post a better punchline in the comment section, and another to repost it with the new punchline.

Why did the blind man cross the road?

Cuz he couldn't see it (Probly already posted but I've never seen it on r/jokes before)

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

Why did KGB officers always travel in threes?

One who could read, one who could write, and the third to watch over those two dangerous intellectuals.

What is the term for someone that gets aroused watching Star Wars?

They have a Bobba Fetish