Favorite Food Jokes

What's a astronauts favorite food?

Lays, because they are full of air.

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What is Vladimir Putins favorite food?

Peaches and Krim

What was the favorite food of the thrifty Italian who loved contractions?

A pasta free.

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Caesar Jokes More Caesar Jokes

What did Caesar say when he went to the whorehouse?

Veni Vidi Veni

What do you call a hen staring at a lettuce?

A chicken Caesar salad.

Quaker Jokes More Quaker Jokes

What clothes do Quakers wear?

Oat couture

What's a cheetah's favorite food?

Fast Food!!! ... I'll see myself out. Credit goes to Safari Animals Oatmeal by Quaker.

Shoulder Jokes More Shoulder Jokes

How does every black joke start?

By looking over your shoulder!

What was the executioner's favorite shampoo?

Head and shoulders.

Food Jokes More Food Jokes

How does a Syrian family have a meal?

The men provide the food and the women do the cooking, leaving the children to wash up afterwards.

How does a barber avoid getting hair in his food?

By giving her a Brazilian wax first!

Ram Jokes More Ram Jokes

What's a closeted Isis fighter's favourite occasion during the year?

ram a man

What is the collective term for rams crossed with llamas who work as Avon representatives??

Rama llama ding dongs

Chinese Jokes More Chinese Jokes

Why can't two Chinese people make a white baby?

Because two Wongs don't make a white

What did the drunken Irishman say to the Chinese diplomat?

http://www.reddit.com/r/Youwritethepunchline/comments/2zg1zy/whatdidthedrunkenirishmansaytothechinese/

Pi Jokes More Pi Jokes

What did the number 1 say to (pi)?

Let's get rational you can't carry on like this!

What are a mathematician's five favourite numbers?

0, 1, e, pi.

Require Jokes More Require Jokes

What's the difference between Swine flu, and Bird flu?

one requires 'oinkment' and the other needs 'tweetment'. i'm sorry.

What is the difference between the avian flu and the swine flu?

One requires a tweetment and the other need an oinkment.