Marsupial Jokes

What do you call a kangaroo stowed away on the curiosity rover?

A Marsupial

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangaroot?

One's a marsupial, the other's a Geordie stuck in a lift

Why didn't the bunny get the job as a marsupial?

He wasn't koalafied!

Why was the marsupial wrongly convicted?

He was tried in a kangaroo court.

Why did everyone trust the marsupial?

Everything he said was troo

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Why did the mathematician quit his job and join NASCAR?

They told him he was good at deriving

What's the difference between your job and your wife?

Nobody does your job for you when you're out

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What do you call a bunny in a kilt?

A hopscotch

What do you get when you cross a peach with a bunny?

Something punny.

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How many kids does Adrian Peterson have?

More than you can shake a stick at

What kind of birds stick together?

Vel-crows

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What do you call a well-written short story?

Articulette

How many biologists does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it and three to write the environmental-impact statement.

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Why is gravity the weakest of the 4 fundamental forces?

Because it doesn't even lift.

What did the jack say to the car?

Can I give you a lift "

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How do Vampires Make Tea?

Used Tampons

Why do hipsters burn their lips when they drink tea?

Because they drink it before it's cool.

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Why did the interrupting cow cross the road?

MOOOOOO!!!!

What's the difference between a tribe of pygmy cannibals and the girls cross country team?

The pygmy cannibals are cunning runts.

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What's the difference between Hillary's e-mails and the UK leaving the EU?

Hillary got off Scott-free.

What's the difference between crime and cybercrime?

At the moment this joke.