Vaccinate Jokes

What did Tammy say after she refused to vaccinate her child?

It's never to late to get an abortion.

This joke may have profanity.

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Why are Democrats stupid enough to believe in climate change?

Because they were vaccinated as children.

What's the difference between parents who don't vaccinate their children and ISIS?

One is a group made up of radicals with extremist views. And the other group is ISIS.

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Radical Jokes More Radical Jokes

Why is the set including the square root of 5 and the square root of 4 similar to the set including anarchism and authoritarianism?

They are both unlike radicals.

What's the difference between parents who don't vaccinate their children and ISIS?

One is a group made up of radicals with extremist views. And the other group is ISIS.

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

What's the difference between a basketball player and a mexican?

Nothing, they both run, jump, shoot and steal.

What's the difference between Anders Breivik and a pro golfer?

Both were happy to shoot 69, but only Breivik went to jail.

Child Jokes More Child Jokes

What was the last thing that went through the Sandy Hook child's mind?

A bullet. I apologize if that joke was aimed for a younger audience. I love Sandy Hook jokes, they never get old. Just like those children.

What do you call a robot that doesn't support his children?

Nuts and bolts

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

How to find out who loves you more - your dog or your wife?

Easy. Lock them both in a trunk and watch who will be happier to see you after you open it in 15 minutes.

Why are you so upset?

It's just hair. I'm the one that's gotta find a new girlfriend."

Mercury Jokes More Mercury Jokes

Why did the Anti vaccinator leave the solar system?

Because he found mercury in it.

Why did Elton John have to go to hospital after the Queen concert?

They found traces of Mercury in him.

Group Jokes More Group Jokes

What do you call a group of Lexus cars?

A fortune!

Why do white girls always walk around in groups of 3?

Because they can't even!

Parent Jokes More Parent Jokes

What do you call a blonde in the freezer?

Her parents named her Cindy so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.

What do you call people who use the "pull out" method for contraception?

Parents.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between the England football team and a teabag?

The teabag stays longer in the cup.

What is the difference between Russian Optimist Pessimist and Realist?

An Optimist learns German. A Pessimist learns Chinese. A Realist learns AK-47.