How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb a tree and act like a nut.

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Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

Why was the penguin banned from the Winter Olympics?

He was caught taking Polaroids.

Why did the pervert cough when he was caught molesting a pony?

He was feeling a little horse.

Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

Why was the cat afraid of the tree?

Because of the tree bark.

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree?

Because he was drunk Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure

Nut Jokes More Nut Jokes

What do you call a one night stand with a robot?

Nut and bolt

What did the web designer do when a hot girl walked up to him and squeezed his nuts?

He AJAXulated.

Climb Jokes More Climb Jokes

Why did the mountain climber quit halfway through his climb?

He really wasn't feeling up to it.

Why can't rock climbing instructors get dates?

Because they rappel men and women.

Squirrel Jokes More Squirrel Jokes

Where are a squirrel and a chipmunk most likely to meet?

A nut house.

What animal do psychiatrists bring in to mental hospitals to help patients with social anxiety?

Squirrels they're the best at getting nuts out of their shells.

Act Jokes More Act Jokes

What is the hardest part about your wife telling you she has AIDS?

Acting surprised.

How to get a job on Game of Thrones: Q: Can you act?

A: Sorta Q: Will you get naked A: Yes HIRED!