How do you make a cat sounds like a dog?

Douse it in gasoline and set it on fire. !

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What kind of dog is the quietest?

A "shhh"nauzer

What happens if you play a country song backward?

You get your house back, your dog back, your wife back, and you sober up.

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

What do you call a storm that's raining cats and dogs?

A furrycanine

Why was the cat afraid of the tree?

Because of the tree bark.

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

What you call it?

takes back mixtape* FIRE!

What do you call a line of diamonds on fire?

Hotline Bling.

Sound Jokes More Sound Jokes

What sound do two photons make when they hit each other?

Planck!*

How do you spell onomatopoeia?

Just spell it like the way it sounds!

Set Jokes More Set Jokes

Why did Neil Armstrong get to set foot on the moon before Buzz Aldrin?

They wrestled over it. Neil had the stronger arm.

What did the set-up say to the punchline?

You're nothing but a joke.

Gasoline Jokes More Gasoline Jokes

What country most despises cars that run on gasoline?

Mad-at-gas-cars!

What does gasoline taste like?

I don't know, I'm in a coma.

Douse Jokes More Douse Jokes

How do you make a cat go "woof"?

Douse it with petrol and toss a lit match. WOOF!

How do you make a cat sounds like a dog?

Douse it in gasoline and set it on fire. !