How do you stop a monster digging up your garden?

Take his spade away.

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Garden Jokes More Garden Jokes

What do you call an epileptic in the garden?

Seizure salad

How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

What is the difference... What is the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods?

Santa stops at three hoes.

How'd you get that cut above your eye?

Me: *Remembering dropping my phone on my face* "STOP ASKING ME ABOUT FIGHT CLUB!"

Dig Jokes More Dig Jokes

Why do so many girls do archaeology degrees?

Because they love digging up the past.

How do you know ancient Egyptians were black?

Because they never dig up daddies.

Spade Jokes More Spade Jokes

How can Euchre and Marriage be similar?

Sometimes you start out all hearts and diamonds, but end up wishing you had a club and a spade.

Which playing card can turn its hand to everything?

Jack of all Spades

Monster Jokes More Monster Jokes

What monster flies his kite in a rain storm?

Benjamin Frankenstein

What monsters are all the tools in the toolbox afraid of?

Vampliers