How many times did I tell you to make your bed?

Jane: I can't answer. I didn't know I was supposed to keep count!

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

Why did Snow White go to bed?

She was feeling Sleepy.

What's warm, white, and I drink almost every night?

Warm milk before bed... Get your mind out of the gutter!

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What do Jaqen H'ghar from Game of Thrones and Christina Aguilera have in common?

They both know "what a girl wants" and "what a girl needs".

What's the difference between a pedant and a sadist?

A sadist is honest about his intentions. That probably wasn't funny, but what do I know?

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

When a cop pulls you over and asks, "Papers?

answer "Scissors." then drive away..

What is honeymoon?

ANSWER: That brief span of time between "I do" and "You'd better!"

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why can't ducks tell jokes when they fly?

Cause they would quack up.

How can you tell if a ghost is about to faint?

He gets pale as a sheet.

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What did the time traveler say at the birthday party?

I'd tell you happy birthday, but to me, you've been dead for centuries

What time is it?

I don't know... it keeps changing.

Count Jokes More Count Jokes

How many shags have you had?

He started counting then fell asleep.

How many lazy people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Count for yourself...

Suppose Jokes More Suppose Jokes

Why are there separate book donation boxes for Nigeria, Ghana, AND Zambia outside the bookstore?

Am I supposed to pick my favorite

Why are 490 Romans are funny ?

Because XD Edit : Sorry about the typo the second are is not supposed to be here