Suppose Jokes

Why do you need to take notes during jokes?

Joke was supposed to be this: Why do you need to take notes during church? because the peoples of noah's day, "took no note".

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Why are MMA fighters told not to blow their nose when in a fight?

Oops, this was supposed to be for . There's no punch line!

Why did the carpenter's wife leave him?

He was screwing around when he was supposed to be nailing her.

Why did the girls fall off the swing?

Someone threw a fridge at her. It's not supposed to make sense

What are you supposed to do when someone is having a seizure in the bath?

throw a load of dirty laundry in.

What do you suppose Ray Rice's fiance' did when he got her home from knocking her out?

The dishes if she knows what's good for her!

What do you call a lawyer up to his neck in cement?

Not enough cement EDIT: Okay thanks for pointing out that I messed up the wording but the joke is supposed to be the funny part

How do you congratulate the guy who won the best tie contest?

You tell him... "that's definitely a win sir". Or if he did ok you can say you half win sir i suppose. :/

Which nation doesn't do what it's supposed to do until it's too late?

Procrastination!

How long are you supposed to wait to return a boy's call?

This IRS guy sounded pretty into me

Where were you supposed to poop?

2-year-old: The potty. Me: So why didn't you 2: I'm too busy.

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Why don't cannibals have dogs?

Because you're not supposed to feed them people food.

What do you call a blonde in the freezer?

Her parents named her Cindy so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.

How are that many Republicans candidates supposed to debate each other at once?

Throw a dollar bill in the floor and let the last one alive run for president.

What are we supposed to do about it?

Dad replies: "I don't know honey, but I think, hitting him would be very wrong."

Why are there separate book donation boxes for Nigeria, Ghana, AND Zambia outside the bookstore?

Am I supposed to pick my favorite

Why did the headless chicken cross the road?

Cause he was supposed to be-headed to the other side

What's supposed to be funny, but let's you down?

This joke...

What am I supposed to do with this computer now?

IT: Work M: Who hurt you

How many times did I tell you to make your bed?

Jane: I can't answer. I didn't know I was supposed to keep count!

How was I supposed to know I wasn't supposed to cook the macaroni necklace?

sigh* Parenting is hard.

What am I supposed to do with this speeding ticket?

Officer, "Keep it, when you collect four of them, you get a bicycle."

How many editors does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: It was supposed to be in place last week!

How's college supposed to prepare you for the real world?

All it does is make you tired and stressed out and anxious and nevermind I get it.

What did the hippy who has been crashing on your couch for the last 2 weeks say when you asked him to leave?

Am I supposed to say the answer or let y'all guess for a bit !

How long are you supposed to chase someone after your wallet gets stolen?

Because I'm tired of running and he's catching up....

What are you supposed to be?

ME: I'm not wearing a costume

How are you supposed to buy a gift for your mom as an adult?

It's like, oh you gave birth to me Please enjoy this fancy candle.

Who are you supposed to be?

4: A ninja.

What is a detective duck supposed to do?

Quack the case! I'll show myself out.

Why are you on this bus?

Aren't you supposed to be driving around in a car "

What do you suppose broke this window Mr. Holmes?

It's a limb entry, my dear Watson!

How was I supposed to know they meant combined?

They really look like adults, especially the 20-years old

What's worse?

Receiving a text from your girlfriend saying that you're breaking up or receiving a second text after saying that it was supposed to be for someone else

How many photos of Kanye West do you suppose Kanye West has on his phone?

More than 1,000

Why is a cow that he jumps?

Because he higher and higher. (I translated the joke from Dutch, and yeah it's supposed to not make any sense, it just sounds funny, in Dutch at least. :-$)

Why did you do that?

I replied,"That's what you're supposed to do in soccer, right Kick balls "

Who names hurricanes?

Are people actually supposed to be intimidated by something named Sandy

Why are ghostbusters afraid of bridges over small rivers?

A. Because they're not supposed to cross the streams

Why are 490 Romans are funny ?

Because XD Edit : Sorry about the typo the second are is not supposed to be here

What am I supposed to take tomorrow?

Doctor: That was a 30 day supply. Me: Whoops.

How big do you suppose that fence is?

I reckon that fence is around a yard."

What did Cinderella say before she got to the ball?

Aghagghhghgagaggag (Those are supposed to be gagging noises)

What time are you supposed to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty!

Why will Michael B Jordan make a bad Human Torch?

Because it's supposed to be the Fantastic Four, not the Fantastic Fo'!