How are you supposed to buy a gift for your mom as an adult?

It's like, oh you gave birth to me Please enjoy this fancy candle.

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Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

Who pushed the neonate out an endometrium?

Your mom.

Where are you and Mom going tonight?

Me: To meet with your teacher. 7: Oh, you don't need to. I already saw her today.

Gift Jokes More Gift Jokes

What gift do you want?

HUSBAND: "An English girl." After a month, wife returns.. HUSBAND: "Where is my gift " WIFE: "Wait for nine months!"

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas?

I don't know. He still hasn't opened his gifts.

Enjoy Jokes More Enjoy Jokes

What's Lisbeth's twin sister's name who enjoys spending time on the internet?

Elizabeth.

How did you get those horrible burns?

flashback to me enjoying some hot soup on a rollercoaster* I saved a litter of puppies from a fire.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

What if I'm always just inexplicably shuffling a deck of cards?

Would you buy that Like "whoa, who's that drifter !"

Where do Chicago football fans buy engagement rings?

De Beers

Birth Jokes More Birth Jokes

How do mermaids give birth?

Via Sea-Section

What do you call a veal-birthing cow?

De-calf

Suppose Jokes More Suppose Jokes

Why are there separate book donation boxes for Nigeria, Ghana, AND Zambia outside the bookstore?

Am I supposed to pick my favorite

Who names hurricanes?

Are people actually supposed to be intimidated by something named Sandy

Adult Jokes More Adult Jokes

Why is the Adults only store open 24hrs?

Because get off at different times.

What are children generally better at then adults?

Giving the pope an errection