When a cop pulls you over and asks, "Papers?

answer "Scissors." then drive away..

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Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

Why should you never hit people with violins?

Because violins is not the answer...

What's the difference between a boy and a girl?

His dad answers, "Well, there's a vas deferens!"

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What do you call a bus full of lawyers driving off a cliff?

A Good Start.(http://www.youtube.com/watch v=obKLdou0LH0)

Who's there ! Bark ! Bark who ?

Bark you car on the drive !

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did the depressed, illiterate pepperoni slice say when asked where he was with his life?

Well it pizza heck out of me.

What's wrong with these eggs I ordered?

Waiter: Don't ask me. I only laid the table.

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

Why did the cop pull over the U-Haul truck?

He was trying to bust a move

What do a burnt pizza, a frozen beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?

In all 3 cases, someone forgot to pull it out.

Paper Jokes More Paper Jokes

What paper product speaks really quickly?

Wrapping paper.

How did the terrorist get into Czechoslovakia?

They didn't czech his papers.

Cop Jokes More Cop Jokes

Why did the cop stink?

Because he fell asleep on duty.

Why do Polish police cars have stripes on the side?

A: So the cops can find the handles.

Scissor Jokes More Scissor Jokes

What does a lesbian pirate say?

Scissor me timbers!

How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one, except she scissors it in.