When a cop pulls you over and asks, "Papers?

answer "Scissors." then drive away..

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Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

How did the 3 legged frog get across the 4 lane freeway?

Take the F out of Free, and the F out of way and you'll have your answer.

What did you ask to Santa Claus this year?

The other one answers: -Oh fifty dollars, like everybody else, why

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What's the fastest way to drive through Louisiana?

Drive the route with Les Miles! ... I'll see myself out.

Why did nobody in the Soviet Union drive manual cars?

They were afraid of Stalin'

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What position makes the ugliest children?

Ask your parents

Whenever I meet a Jim I ask, "is that short for Jimberly?

and I have few friends in real life.

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

What's the difference between sin and shame?

It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out."

What's the difference between the stock market and women?

With the stock market you can only lose when you pull out.

Paper Jokes More Paper Jokes

Why cant Mexicans smoke joints?

They aint ever got any papers

Why do they ask you if you want paper or plastic at the supermarket?

Because baggers can't be choosers.

Cop Jokes More Cop Jokes

How many cops does it take to arrest a broken light bulb?

Two. One arrests the room for being black. The other arrests the bulb for being broke.

What do you call it when two cops dance?

Pork Grinds

Scissor Jokes More Scissor Jokes

What did one lesbian pirate say to the other?

Scissor me timbers!

What does a lesbian pirate say?

Scissor me timbers!