What do you call a guy that hates Christmas and steals the woman you love?

Ebenezer Scrooge-yagirl

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Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What did one Christmas ornament say to the other Christmas ornament?

Let's hang.

What does the kid with no legs get for Christmas?

Cancer.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

Why are there no Walmarts in Syria?

Because there is a target on every corner. Guys, this syriaous.

What do you call a guy with 15 rabbits up his arse?

Warren.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do women want?

She has been talking nonstop for the last two days.

Why is a laundromat a really bad place to pick up women?

Because a woman who can't afford her own washing machine won't be able to support you.

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why do Europeans hate American food?

Europeans don't want to die yet. Unlike Americans who don't wanna diet.

Why do feminists hate Medusa?

She's always objectifying people.

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

How do you know Jesus loves Japanese food?

Because he said he loves miso.

Why did the little piglet fall in love with the hog?

Because he was such a sloppy dresser.

Steal Jokes More Steal Jokes

What do you call a duck that likes to steal?

A Robber Ducky!

What's green and says "hey I'm a frog"?

A talking frog! Stolen from "Friends" still hilarious.

Ebenezer Scrooge Jokes More Ebenezer Scrooge Jokes

How does Ebenezer Scrooge make phone calls?

Collect!

Why did Ebenezer Scrooge go to New York City?

A: To see the Grumpire State Building.