What do you get if you cross a woodpecker with a carrier pigeon ?

A bird who knocks before delivering its message !

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Knock Jokes More Knock Jokes

What did the blonde say when she knocked over a priceless Ming vase?

A. "It's okay Daddy I'm not hurt."

Knock knock. Who's there? Opportunity.

That is impossible. Opportunity doesn’t come knocking twice!

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why did Sally drop her ice cream while crossing the street?

She got hit by a Bus.

What do you get when you cross menstruation and apples?

The MaxiPad

Bird Jokes More Bird Jokes

Why was the bird sick?

It had the flew and its throat was soar.

Why did the bird refuse Martin Luther's food?

It was on a strict diet of worms. edit: changed pronoun to avoid ambiguity

Deliver Jokes More Deliver Jokes

What does a Obstetrician and a well written joke have in common?

They deliver

What is a long, tiresome speech delivered by a frothy pie topping?

Meringue-harangue

Message Jokes More Message Jokes

How do you get a woman to stop texting you?

Reply to her message within a minute

Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese person?

You have to drop the bomb twice before they get the message

Woodpecker Jokes More Woodpecker Jokes

Why did the owl owl ?

Because the woodpecker would peck 'er !

What do you call a woodpecker with no beak ?

A headbanger !