What's it like to tweet "My cat sneezed" and get 500 RT in the first minute ?

My cat would be dead before I got 50

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Like Jokes More Like Jokes

Why do Democrats like to play Pokemon?

They've always enjoyed rounding up Japanese monsters.

Why did Frosty drop his pants?

Because he's a pervert that likes showing people his snowballs.

Cat Jokes More Cat Jokes

Why did the cat get arrested for playing a violin?

Because it was a kitty fiddler.

What was Schrodinger's favorite childhood book?

The Cat in the Box by Dr. Seuss

50 Jokes More 50 Jokes

What's it like to tweet "My cat sneezed" and get 500 RT in the first minute ?

My cat would be dead before I got 50

What do you call an Englishman with an IQ of 50?

Colonel, sir.

Minute Jokes More Minute Jokes

How long did Dorothy, the Scarecrow, and the Cowardly Lion have to wait for the Tin Man?

Ten minutes.

How did the hour and minute hands of the clock get cancer?

Second hand smoking! My own joke that I've been meaning to put up for a while. Time to see how it goes haha.

Sneeze Jokes More Sneeze Jokes

What does a nut say when it sneezes?

Cashew.

What do you say when a virgin sneezes?

Goesintight.

500 Jokes More 500 Jokes

What's 16 centimetres long and makes every girl happy?

A 500 bill.

How did the babysitter lose 500 kids and keep her job?

She swallowed

Tweet Jokes More Tweet Jokes

What's white & falls from the sky?

The coming of the Lord." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ...please enjoy this tweet. I'm going to hell.

What am I doing with the rest of my life?

I don't even know what I'm doing with the rest of this tweet...